The Great Municipal Shakedown

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🔹 Congrats to our Dear Caddie contest winner Jon M. who won a NFL quarter-zip from Cutter & Buck ($150 value) and all he had to do was submit a Dear Caddie question! See his winning question in the Dear Caddie section below this week’s story!

Dear readers, picture a public golf course in a city that's seen better decades. The locals used to joke that the only thing more consistent than the desert wind was the waitlist for Saturday tee times.

These days, the greens are browning, the sand traps look like construction zones and the tee sheet mysteriously "crashes" whenever locals try to book online. The kind of place where retirees play dawn patrol and high school teams practice after school is now a crime scene in slow motion.

At first, members blamed bad luck or budget cuts. Then they realized who was running the show and suddenly, everything made sense.

The Partnership

A few years back, the city's finances were tight. Municipal golf wasn't bleeding money, but it wasn't exactly thriving. Enter a private management company with a proposal: "Let us run operations. We'll cut costs, improve conditions and save taxpayers money."

The company, let's call them Summit Golf Management, also happened to run one of the region's most exclusive private clubs. Six-figure initiation fees and a membership roster loaded with political donors and power brokers in polos. 

The city council approved the contract with minimal debate. "Shared resources," they said. "Better golf for everyone," they promised.

What could possibly go wrong?

The Decline

Everything went wrong. Deliberately.

Fertilizer orders were delayed. Sprinkler systems sat broken, "awaiting parts." The snack bar cut its hours in half. Maintenance staff got reassigned to "projects across town" which our sources say means the private club. Equipment that broke at the public course was "sent out for repair" and mysteriously appeared in the private club's maintenance barn.

The public course's budget showed "consulting fees" paid directly to Summit Golf Management. Consulting on what, exactly? Advanced techniques in negligence?

Tee times that used to be bookable seven days out were now "system limited" to 48 hours - unless you were a "preferred guest," which meant private club members slumming it when their own course was too crowded.

Sources inside the maintenance department painted a consistent picture: this wasn’t mismanagement. It was demolition by design.

The Mayor's New Clubhouse

Meanwhile, the mayor had become such a regular at the private club's cocktail lounge that locals joked he was counting it as office hours. Campaign finance records showed several club members donated maximum amounts to his re-election fund.

When asked about the public course's decline, he blamed "market forces" and "changing demographics" which was odd, considering the course was profitable until the management contract was signed.

At a recent council meeting, he suggested the city might need to "explore all options" for the property.

Guess who's positioned to buy?

The Resistance

Locals aren't going quietly. They've packed council meetings with Google Earth images comparing the public course's brown patches to the private club's emerald perfection - same climate, same water restrictions, wildly different results. "They say golf teaches integrity," one longtime regular told us. "I guess that depends on who's keeping score."

A forensic accountant they hired found something interesting buried in the contract: a clause letting Summit buy the land "at fair market value" if the city deems it "unsustainable." Convenient how unsustainable it's become.

Reviews of public records show the contract was negotiated behind closed doors and approved in a 4-3 vote. The three dissenting council members have since been voted out. Their replacements? All endorsed by the mayor. All spotted at the private club.

The Endgame

Here's how this story ends:

The course will close within two years. The city will declare it "financially unsustainable" and sell the land for pennies on the acre. Summit Golf Management will buy it, renovate it with the same equipment that mysteriously "broke" at the public course and reopen it as a private club with a lofty initiation fee.

At the ribbon-cutting ceremony, the mayor will pose for photos and call it "a win for fiscal responsibility." He'll likely get a lifetime honorary membership for his trouble.

The families who used to play there on weekends will drive past gates they can't enter. The high school team will practice at a driving range thirty miles away. The retirees who played dawn patrol will find another hobby.

And somewhere, in a boardroom overlooking perfectly manicured greens, executives will toast their newest acquisition and discuss which struggling public course to "help" next.

That's not management, dear readers. That's a heist in khakis.

Poll Question

Last Week's Poll Result

Who gives the best advice at your club?

🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 The Bartender

🟨🟨🟨⬜️⬜️⬜️ The Caddie

🟨🟨🟨🟨⬜️⬜️ The Head Pro

🟨🟨⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️ Nobody, that's why I'm divorced!

Some things are what they are, and bartenders can’t be defeated when it comes to giving advice. Then again, considering the fact that when bartenders give advice, you’ve had a few drinks - maybe we just think it’s good advice? After all, they’re incentivized to keep us coming back for more, so isn’t it better for them if we compound our problems? Hmmm…

Lastly, if you are a new subscriber don’t forget to catch up on past stories at ccconfidential.vip - and while you’re at it, tell a friend!

Here is your winning Dear Caddie sumbmission!

Dear Caddie,
My regular foursome includes a guy who insists on giving unsolicited swing advice. He’s a 15 handicap who still uses iron covers and calls his driver “Big Bertha.” How do I tell him to shut up without losing my spot in the group?
— Over-Coached in Coachella

Dear Over-Coached,
Ah, the classic mid-cap mentor - part coach, part cautionary tale. Here’s the play: next time he offers a tip, take it. Execute it badly. Real badly. Chunk it, top it, shank it into a neighboring HOA. Then turn to him and say, “That one’s on you, coach.” He’ll stop. Or he’ll double down, which is fine - at least now you’ve got a scapegoat for every bad shot until Christmas!

Got a problem that only Dear Caddie can solve? Click HERE or email us at [email protected] - anonymity guaranteed, brutal honesty promised!

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