The Hole-in-One Curse

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Dear readers, there are certain expectations following an ace: a round of drinks, an insufferable retelling, perhaps a modest plaque. But at a club we’ll call Blackwood Hills Golf Club, a hole-in-one doesn't just earn you a bar tab - it marks you for misfortune with the precision of a ProV1 finding the bottom of the cup.

Members of this ultra-exclusive Northeast enclave maintain public skepticism. Coincidence, they tell outsiders. Statistical anomalies, they insist. But in private, those who've occupied the same leather chairs in the men's grill for decades know better. The curse is real, documented in whispers and sidelong glances when someone new joins their reluctant fraternity.

"We've kept a private ledger since 1977," confides our source, a board member who requested anonymity. "Every ace, followed by what happened after. The pattern is... undeniable."

Take James Harrington, whose 4-iron found the challenging 13th hole during the 1994 Founder's Cup. Respected investment banker by day, Harrington was indicted for securities fraud 72 hours later. The SEC investigation had been ongoing for months, but the timing only reinforced the legend.

"The thirteenth is particularly vindictive," our source explained. "Four aces in club history. Four professional ruins within a month."

Then there's "The Divorce Season" of 2007. Three different members aced the iconic 7th hole between June and August. By Valentine's Day 2008, all three marriages had dissolved. Sure, it happened to overlap the beginning of The Great Recession, but surprisingly none of the members were in real estate or finance. 

When one ex-wife was overheard saying, "A hole-in-one is just a hole-in-one, but freedom is priceless," Blackwood Hills' divorcees nodded knowingly.

Most disturbing is the case of Theodore Miller, the club's 1977 champion. After acing the 17th hole to secure his victory, Miller celebrated modestly, then departed for his lakeside cabin. His Mercedes was found the next morning on a remote road, engine running, driver's door open. Despite exhaustive searches, Miller vanished completely. The membership quietly voted to retire his locker, which has remained empty ever since, even in boom times when locker availability grew scarce.

The 2012 Member-Member added another dark chapter when two players recorded aces in the same round. That evening, as celebrations peaked, an electrical fire gutted the historic men's locker room. Though officially ruled an accident, certain board members ensured minimal publicity. The subsequent renovation included one telling detail - the trophy case no longer displays hole-in-one plaques.

An unspoken protocol now governs play at Blackwood Hills. Veterans subtly counsel new members to avoid direct lines at par-3 pins. During guest days, visitors are puzzled when their hosts deliberately play away from accessible hole locations. "Miss left, miss right, but never perfect" has become an unwritten commandment.

The club's director of golf, who inherited the position after his predecessor made an ace and subsequently suffered a career-ending hand injury, maintains a diplomatic stance. "Golf is a game of statistics," he offers carefully. "Extraordinary achievements sometimes correlate with extraordinary circumstances."

But watch his eyes when a tee shot flies dangerously close to the pin on Blackwood's par-3s. You'll see him hold his breath until the ball settles safely away from perfection.

Should you receive a coveted invitation to this particular sanctuary, consider yourself warned. As you stand on those pristine par-3 tees, club in hand and possibility in the air, remember what Blackwood's oldest member reportedly whispered to a junior champion about to strike a perfect shot: "Some cups are better left unfilled, and some achievements extract a price that no trophy can justify."

*Special thanks to CCC member Rick G. for the story tip

Poll Question

Last Week's Poll Result

What do you think really happened to Danny Finnegan? 🤔

🟨🟨🟨⬜️⬜️⬜️ 🔘 💰 He took the payoff and disappeared

🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 🔘 🐊 The Alligator made sure he never left Cypress Hills

🟨🟨🟨⬜️⬜️⬜️ 🔘 🌲 He started a new life up north

🟨⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️ 🔘 👻 Just another ghost story to spook the caddies

Our readers are a cynical bunch, but the again, so are we… our vote was that he never left Cypress Hills too. The Alligator seemed a little insane in the brain, like he could just kill a man.

A big congrats again to frequent poll voter/commentor Jack D. who said, “The Alligator willingness to devastate innocent people leads me to believe he would stop at nothing to get what he wanted.” We agree and congrats again on winning last week’s prize! 👏👏👏